Why women fall in love with dangerous men

Interest in real crime stories is at an all-time high. It seems that every week there is a new docuseries, book or podcast digging up a heartbreaking story of a man or a group of men who hurt women. We could see these stories and ask ourselves, how could this happen? How can people miss the red flags of such an obvious relationship? But it is not as simple as that.

When the trailer for the Ted Bundy Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile biopic was released in January 2019, people who were not familiar with Bundy’s case were shocked to discover that he had tricked so many women into trusting him before he killed them. Not everything is true-crime either. After you landed on Netflix in December 2018, many wondered how Beck, the object of Joe’s affection, did not realize he was harassing her, hacking her phone and kidnapping and killing people close to her.

Why women fall in love with dangerous men

This is nothing new. Dangerous men have hurt women as they mingle with society for decades. But how does it happen?

1. The lure of authority

The women rushed to say that they did not find men dressed in fast-food uniforms attractive, even when the models were attractive. However, responding to the photo of the less handsome man (with an elegant jacket, designer watch and described as a doctor), some women said they would happily marry him, and others were willing to date him. (That’s why Prince William has so many fans and Steve Hofmeyr leaves a trail of illegitimate children in his path). These trends operate in everyday life.

2. They scramble your brain

Women can detect a dominant man miles away, and almost all the qualities of a powerful man trigger excitement in his brain. These include dominant scents, dominant steps, deep voices, height, arrogance, bravado, and displays of wealth.

3. Blame evolution

Behaviorists claim that this attraction is reduced to evolution: women are programmed to respond sexually to men who command boardrooms, boast bank balances and exude masculine energy. The reason? The woman in the caverns inside you desperately wants her offspring to have the best chance of survival, and a man with strong and powerful genes wins the prehistoric jackpot. Many women often perceive “common” men as difficult to handle, so an influential and high-profile man is considered an even greater challenge.

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4. It’s an ego boost

For some women, having an intimate relationship with someone in a leadership role can be a supreme boost for self-esteem. Unconsciously, you might think that others would see you as powerful by power; After all, you’ve managed to “tame” an important man. The yearning for admiration and respect could result in attraction to a powerful man.

5. Men’s own insecurities

It turns out that men’s insecurities also play an important role. Men in power often succeed because of their deep insecurities. Many powerful men from a financial or organizational point of view feel false. “Deep down, they fear that people will see beyond the facade towards their hidden being that they cannot love, and that they will be rejected and will fail. Each conquest proves that they are desirable and helps avoid that fear. “

In the wake of these scandals, the media are happy to expose all the sordid details, but gender activists and academics say that when men sexually harass women.

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6. Good ol’ testosterone…

Hormones have a role to play, where an excess of testosterone may be partly responsible for the fall of presidents, politicians and patriarchs. Powerful men have a greater sense of law, but they also tend to have higher levels of testosterone, which they depend on to function. But although women’s hormones are the target of too many sexist jokes, having a greater amount of testosterone is often considered desirable for “fairer” sex. Men with high levels of testosterone tend to be more aggressive, have a greater sexual desire, want to dominate and are self-centered.

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